The morning started out like any other one; I gradually woke up over a period of 25 minutes and seven hits of the snooze button, shuffled into the bathroom, shower caddy in hand, and completed my morning sanitary rituals. After drying off and dressing, I left my dorm and started to the cafeteria.

Every breakfast I have in the cafeteria is exactly the same – a bowl of Cap’n Crunch and a glass of apple juice. The breakfast of academic champions!

I was expecting to have the very same breakfast this morning as well. I picked up my tray, grabbed a glass, dispensed the apple juice, then headed over to the cereal and milk station. I picked up a plastic bowl and started looking at the line-up of cereal dispensers for my lovable Cap’n.

O Cap’n! My Cap’n!

Cap’n Crunch was nowhere to be found! I double checked the signs, triple checked them, then resorted to looking up close at the individual bits of cereal in the containers, certain in my mind that someone had simply mislabeled my beloved Cap’n Crunch. But alas, it appears the Cap’n was lost at sea. Dejected, I settled for Cinnamon Toast Crunch, the cereal of my childhood, the cereal I thought I had outgrown since coming to college.

And just when I thought I would go the day without a Crunch…

After breakfast and calculus class I made my way to the science building for Chemistry. The weather being cold (it is January, after all), I was completely bundled up: A thick woolen jacket zipped all the way up; scarf wrapped tightly around my neck; my hands buried in my pockets for warmth; iPod earbuds in my ears for enjoyment. I passed the crest of the hill along the path to the science building and started the slight descent. Today the descent was much greater. I hit a patch of black ice and, in one fluid motion, with no hope of recovery, totally wiped out. My hands were too deep into my pockets to even consider attempting a save. My legs flung out with good speed and I came down flat on my back. Fortunately, my backpack cushioned my fall quite nicely – I barely felt a thing.

After collecting myself and reaching the science building, I was greeted by a few friends and my Chemistry professor, all witnesses to my wipeout. They asked if I was okay and then explained that they had been watching the ice dominate student after student. They estimated around two-dozen victims by the time I had crashed. I thought about asking them why they didn’t warn anyone, but before I could I watched another student take a spill on the nefarious patch of ice. That’s when I knew why they weren’t trying to help anyone: it was way too funny to ruin. So I spent the next few minutes watching everyone else discover the ice the hard way.